I was born and raised in an orthodox Christian family which includes the routine of going to church every Sunday, attending regular prayer meetings and sermons. I grew up with a strong belief that there is a God, but I was never a religious person.

Christianity can become really complex when you try to get a deeper understanding. We are forced to believe that God is one who exists in three forms (Father, son and Holy Spirit and to this day I cannot comprehend what the Holy Spirit means) but this subject will not stand strong to test by reason. So, by the time I was starting to reason with everything in life and reason with what I was following; I was not convinced. My church going reduced, prayer meetings and being part of religious gatherings reduced too. My belief in God and that we are accountable to a higher power was there, but a religion as a means to it, was not something I believed in. There was a profound hypocrisy I saw in people around me and in the common belief that religion needs to be changed to suit the times we live in. It simply makes religion an evolving philosophy to suit our requirements and comforts, accommodate our vices and pleasures. It was not really appealing to me and I never felt humbled in front of it either. I never knew what Islam was and I thought it was just another religion out there which was more ritualistic like Hinduism. I chose to live by my own moral code of judgement using reason to judge between good and bad. Reason, is one of God?s greatest gifts and that should be used to drive your conscience in the right path. It was during this time I realised the concept of Interest to be an Evil scheme designed to drain you out of your earnings slowly but steadily. I did believe that women should be appropriately clothed to avoid any harm being done to them. I also followed principles such as never return a gift to show your displeasure etc… A friend of mine told me that I am already a half Muslim and I laughed. I was told that all this was in the Qur’an which tells us what we follow.

Then, I slowly started learning what Islam was all about. It was just another intellectual quest for me. I read this book; The Qur’an and The Bible, in the light of science, by Dr. Zakir Naik. I was not only surprised by the scientific accuracy of the Qur’an against the Bible but also realised it wasn’t very different after all. The facts were simple -It was the next book revealed after the bible. -The book has not been changed to suit the times, rather whatever the time or era we live in, we live by it (the word from Allah) which is something that I was looking for but I never believed existed. -It also exists in the original language that it was revealed In fact, I found it very hard to accept such a thing initially because of the delusional world we live in. So, I decided to learn more and I started watching a lot of videos of Dr. Zakir Naik on comparative studies and also on explanation of the Qur’an and I was surprised by it. A book that has never been changed, in its original language and many people know it by heart. I found it hard to ignore what I was seeing. It was no longer another intellectual quest but it was the ultimate truth. I saw another video by Brother Yusuf Estes explaining to a young man ? Gabriel, why he chose Islam from being a Christian and that really moved me. I could relate to him so much. At this point, I was almost convinced of Qur’an, but I did not accept Islam yet, as I wanted to learn more about the Prophet who had revealed this book. On many Non-Muslim sources, there are many controversial mentions about him and I wanted to clear my misconceptions. I have come across many Muslims who happened to be the most humble and selfless people I have ever encountered in my life. If they were to follow the ways of such a controversial man, how can they be so genuine? I searched for answers to clear my misconceptions and wanted to read his biography from an authentic source and I read, When the Moon Split. I was so much attracted to the person he was. I used to wonder why so many Muslims follow the Hadiths and try to be like him. He indeed deserved to be called the greatest man to have ever lived on the face of the earth. I sometimes read an incident or his way of dealing with a situation many times over. Such was the extent to which I adored him and his ways. The bible says “Seek ye the truth and the truth shall set you free” when I did that, this is where my quest for truth ended. I was convinced of Islam and that Mohammed (peace be upon him) was the Messenger for the whole of mankind. I knew Islam was not just a religion for the weekend, but it is a way of life. It was a very simple, uncomplicated and right way of life. I accepted Islam whole-heartedly. Although, My arrogance still never faded away.

I still disagreed on one aspect. I hear every scholar say ? If the Qur’an says it, you follow it and don’t question it. Allah has a reason and Allah is the master planner etc. Well, I’d say let me just scrutinise its purpose before I follow just to be sure. Until this point, I did exactly that. I had no objection to believe that Islam was the truth, but I was one step less closer to Allah, because I wanted to check the purpose or logic for all His words before I followed it. (I just thought the Quran is irrefutable so there is no harm to question to get a deeper understanding). I had many questions and got my answers through some unexpected ways, I just believed it was just logic of life. There was one question to which I simply was not convinced with any answer to it. This was for a very long time, though I was convinced with many teachings of Islam, I was not convinced about ? Why perform wudu before Salah? I really could not comprehend why wudu was necessary theoretically speaking. Some of the questions I asked myself was – Why wouldn?t Allah listen to us if we are unclean? What is this concept that Salah becomes Invalid? Why would Allah force someone to be clean to pray or talk to him? Can we tell a daily worker, a mechanic, a roadside vendor, a traveller, a salesman walking door to door etc ? come clean and talk to me! How rude and cruel is that? Why would Allah do that? Why is He so harsh or cruel? All these questions, because I really did not understand the logic behind wudu and I was not convinced with anyone’s explanation.

Anyways, I was about to do my prayer for the first time and I had learnt how to perform wudu as well. So I went ahead and performed wudu for the first time. When I completed wudu, I felt so ashamed of myself. I just knew how wrong I was and my questions were! After wudu I felt so fresh, energetic and clean. I felt that I had done something on myself and re-energised myself. It just dawned on me ? Allah doesn?t ask us to do it for Him, but He wants us to do it for our own good. I was arguing that a daily worker, a mechanic, a roadside vendor, a traveller, salesman walking door to door etc, can remain dirty and still pray but Allah gives them a reason to refresh themselves, energise themselves, not once but 5 times a day. Mashaallah! So selfless is His love for us and when I felt that love at that moment, it really humbled me. I went on to do my first prayer. I just knew from then on! Whatever Allah gives is for your best, you just have to trust him and thank him. Ask not for what we want but for what?s best for us and trust Him to do the rest. He knows best and He alone knows best. One of the best things that was appealing about Islam, is the simplicity it has to all aspects of it. There are many people like me who have the same misconceptions I once had about Islam. In the near future, I would spend more time to learn in detail about the simplicity in the concepts of Islam and it?s applicability to everyday life but hopefully in a much less arrogant way!

Frederick Stephenson, for AAT