“Oh dear, did they get another one! I seriously feel sorry for them, for already having two daughters and now having a third one… What terrible luck!!!”

Three daughters or more are often considered to be taboo in some societies and parents have to bear the endless expressions of unwanted sympathy, pity and commiserations, consoling the parents by saying “Don’t worry, don’t grieve, we shall pray that you shall be blessed with a boy next time In Sha Allah.” Even on christening ceremonies, the new born daughter is looked upon by pitiful faces and given wishes for good fortune.

“Good fortune”! Indeed, does such a term even properly apply to us Muslims who believe in the concept of predestined fate. Then why should we offer our condolences to such parents when Allah Ar Raaziq has willed for such a girl to enter into this world as their daughter.

By our incessant condolences, we actually turn the short lived happiness that the parents feel into despair, giving them the feeling of being unfortunate, making them feel derogatory! Yet should having a girl cause such despair?

What about the hadith where the Messenger (Peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said, “Whoever has three daughters or three sisters, cares for them and disciplines them, he and I shall be like this is in Paradise” – as he was putting his index and middle fingers together.” [Abu Ya’la ~ Classed as Sahih by Sh Al-Albaani]

This hadith shows the virtue and importance of caring for ones’ daughters and sisters whereby the Prophet (Peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) mentioned that whoever has three daughters or three sisters and cares for them and disciplines them, they will be in paradise. Islam emphasizes the importance of caring for our daughters and sisters due to their fragility and sensitivity, so they require protection from their fathers and brothers so that no harm is done to them.

Moreover, this hadeeth applies to both the father and the mother. The same applies if he has sisters or paternal or maternal aunts etc., and he treats them kindly, we hope that he will attain Paradise for that.

And Allah knows best.

Our blessed Prophet (Peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) also had 4 daughters, and he treated them with utmost kindness.

He Prophet (peace be upon him) would stand up for his daughter Fatimah (may Allah be pleased with her) when she would come to him, take her hands, kiss her and let her take his seat. Likewise, whenever the prophet (peace be upon him) came to her she would stand up for him, take his hand and kiss him.

So therefore, it is incumbent that we annihilate this ridiculous notion where girls are considered to be a burden on their parents, for indeed they by the will of Allah may be the pavement for their parents to paradise, and a protection from the fire.

Furthermore, it should be understood that just giving birth to three daughters does not fulfil the criteria of the aforementioned hadith, rather it is important that we raise them up and discipline them according to the Islamic Shariah.

May Allah facilitate for us the path to Jannah Ameen

Bint Ayesha, AAT, Writer